After planning a large party for the holidays to raise money for your community, you begin receiving RSVPs from most of your guest list. Two weeks from the event date, after you have already paid for the venue and menu people start to cancel the date. No problem, you planned ahead for a few cancellations so that did not affect the overall event. By the time that the event is about to begin you find out that the majority of your guests have canceled or are a no call no-show. But you have already paid for the venue, food and drinks, and decorations. You go on with the event only having a hand full of your guest show up, and vow to never throw another party again.
Even though you planned to have a big event that would benefit others and it did not go as you imagined, it does not mean that it was a failure. You still had attendees, everyone had fun, and you were still able to contribute to your community. Not everything will turn out as you plan, and that is ok. This can happen with a party, school, or in life. If we learn to go with the flow and appreciate the smaller things in life then we will start to see all of the good that happens. Even in the midst of your plans falling apart all around you, take a moment to laugh. This simple act can take us out of utter despair and bring perspective back into the picture.
We can begin by identifying the feelings that we are having at each moment so that we can fully process what is going on. Maybe at the beginning of your planning process, you feel excited at the prospect of what could happen in the event you succeed. You can still be excited even if the plan that you came up with does not happen accordingly because you came up with a great idea. Maybe the timing was just off or it was not feasible to meet the needs of your full plans. The next feeling could be fear at the fact that your plans are failing and you thought that you had researched all outcomes. We have to understand and accept that not everything will happen as we plan even when we have made backup options. Perhaps it is not meant to be at this time and maybe you can attempt it at a later date, but don’t give up.
Allow yourself to feel disappointment, shame, judgment, anger, and sadness. These emotions are nothing to fear and are apart of human life. But we can’t become stuck in any one feeling because we then lose sight of what really matters. Surrendering to humility allows us to grow and develop as individuals, we can all be wrong at some point in life. It is ok to make mistakes, but be open to learning something from the experience. It is not easy to remain conscious of your feelings of failure but with practice, we can begin to enjoy both the successes and the mistakes as a natural progression in life.
Within You 